Guilty of Making Me Blush: Our Verdict on the Most Dangerous Compliment

Compliments arrive in all kinds of clothing, and this court has seen every outfit. Some are sent over by the dozen like cheap roses. Some are delivered in the dark with a perfectly straight face. Today I am trying three of them for one specific offense: making a grown adult blush at an inconvenient moment. The accused have been waiting in the corridor, and one of them has already tried to charm the bailiff.

The first defendant is the Classic: you are beautiful. A respectable fellow, well dressed, much traveled. The court admits it can land softly, particularly when the speaker means it, as I assume the characters of TheFriend, Valentina, Lara and Luna, do within the stories they live in. But the Classic has a flaw. It could be said to anyone, on any evening, and the heart knows it. Blushes need specifics, and this defendant is carrying none.

The first defendant is the Classic: you are beautiful.

The second defendant is the Observation: you always pause before you laugh, as if you are deciding whether to trust the joke. Now we are somewhere. This compliment shows its working. It says I have been watching you with an interest that has not found its way out of the room. Specific, intimate, slightly invasive in the most flattering way. It earns a respectable blush and a nervous glance at the nearest mirror.

The third defendant is the Echo: I have been thinking about what you said yesterday. No adjectives. No decoration. Just a quiet confession that your words traveled home with someone and sat down on the sofa. The court regards this as the most dangerous compliment on the docket, because it flatters your mind, your memory and your pull, all at once. It also cannot be dismissed as a line, since lines do not usually wait overnight.

The verdict: the Echo is guilty on all counts, with the Observation sentenced to a close second and the Classic released on probation. Remember that the blush is not caused by the praise but by the proof of attention. If you wish to test the theory, speak with Valentina, Lara or Luna on TheFriend and notice which sentence sends warmth up your neck. The court will not ask for names. The court will simply be smirking.